If you ask most women they’ll tell you; the clitoris is their principal erogenous zone. The clitoris is a small little nub located at the top of the vaginal opening, for some women part of the clitoris is somewhat concealed by a flap(s) of skin. The labia generally covers up the long part of the clitoris and disappears into the body.
As you might have heard, the clitoris is very sensitive and responsive. As a woman’s arousal level increases the clitoris will pull back beside the pubic bone; then the labia swells, making the clitoris become somewhat rigid. In this way, the clitoris functions in a similar manner to that of the penis. Due to its miniscule stature, and slightly hidden placement, the clitoris is something of a mystery among some people. Some men have trouble simply locating it, and then falter in trying to excite it properly. Most women cannot reach climax without some form of clitoral stimulation, but many aren’t eager to direct their partner toward that area, and also don’t want to take care of it themselves during intercourse either. To make matters worse, there are a lot of conflicting theories out there regarding what women should be doing to become more orgasmic.
A popular theory comes from Freud, who touts the superiority of vaginal orgasms over clitoral ones. It’s this kind of theory that has probably caused a lot of damage to women’s sexual lives. The clitoris is not a supernatural object that makes women orgasm instantly; but it is very important and should be involved in most sexual activities.
Help your lady friend overcome her bashfulness about masturbation. You can learn a lot about pleasing her by watching her do it herself. But the stigmata remains, most women still feel shameful about performing for others. They could also have boundaries with regards to the specific way sex is performed which will ultimately inhibit them even more so. Chances are however, that if you get her into it by telling her how much it ‘turns you on’ she may ultimately go with the flow.
Get your man to understand that the need for clitoral stimulation is normal.
A lot of guys are still under the impression that they should be able to fulfill their partner’s needs with their penis by itself. Inform him of your desires in the sexiest way possible. If possible tell him that you aren’t very good at explaining things and would rather demonstrate. Naturally, almost all guys are going to be extremely turned on by the proposition. After all that, they should definitely feel more relaxed about the whole setup.
Enjoy the ride, and don’t try to force her orgasm. Most women are probably going to tell you that it is harder for her to orgasm with another person than it is by herself. Don’t try to command her or force her to climax (this will only move her farther away), be gentle and assuring instead.
